Well, I don’t know about anyone else, but I’m sure enjoying the 2010 NFL offseason. Maybe it’s the lack of a salary cap, maybe Saturn is moving into orbit with some unknown planet, or perhaps Flozell Adams has finally eaten enough fried dough to shake the Earth from its axis – whatever it is, things appear to be lining up in a perfect storm of player movement that’s just plain entertaining as hell to watch.
However, it also means that since 50% of professional sports owners and/or GM’s are certifiably insane and without a shred of common sense, there are some things happening right now that defy all manner of logic and reason. Of course, since most of these things are happening to other people’s teams, I’m enjoying this as well. Hey, I never claimed to be some kind of compassionate saint when it comes to football – if your team is mucking up its future, I figure the least they can do is provide material for me to raise my pageviews.
So without further ado, here’s the biggest five inconceivable moves from the NFL offseason.
1) The Jets let Thomas Jones walk and then sign LaDanian Tomlinson… for almost the same amount of money.
If you want to let the veteran go to make room for the younger guy, I can understand. But dumping a productive veteran – a guy who rushed for 1,400+ yards last season – and then replacing him with another veteran who didn’t even crack a thousand yards and appears to be limping along on his last leg is pretty confusing. Paying more money for the broken down guy is downright dumb. How far into the season before Jets fans are thinking they coulda had a V8?
2) The Seahawks give Charlie Whitehurst an obscene contract.
I can see trading for a guy whom you think has potential – depending on what you have to give up and the situation your team is in, it can look very shrewd down the road should things pan out. Even if they don’t, if the deal is done right, it can be written off without too much notice. Apparently, the Seahawks are unfamiliar with this concept because they’re willing to trade for a third string quarterback with zero regular season pass attempts and then give him $5 million this year and next. I understand that Matt Hasselbeck may or may not be done this season or next, but… damn is that a lot of money for someone who could wind up being the next Doug Johnson. Someone should really let Pete Carroll know that this isn’t USC anymore – he doesn’t have to pay that much for talent in the NFL…
3) The Washington Redskins have turned into the Oakland A’s of football.
All right, so maybe it isn’t that extreme, but when was the last time Washington was this thrifty during the offseason? Daniel Snyder has always spent on free agents like there wasn’t a salary cap, and now that there finally isn’t one… nothing. I wonder if anyone filled Mike Shanahan in on this change of heart before he signed up to coach? What do you mean we aren’t going after Julius Peppers?! I thought you printed your own money here… What? Building through the draft and developing young players?! NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
4) The Cardinals apparently conceding the NFC West in March.
Through no fault of their own, the Cards lost their starting quarterback, Kurt Warner, to retirement. Before the offseason even truly began, that put Arizona in the precarious position of backsliding from the recent success the franchise has experienced over the past 2 years. Now, they’ve traded Anquan Boldin to the Ravens, let Antrel Rolle head off into the sunset, and didn’t want to pay Karlos Dansby. If that wasn’t enough, Ken Wisenhunt further depressed all 13 Cardinals fans by saying that Matt Leinart is “the guy” atop the quarterback depth chart. To cement that, they managed to pick up the even streakier Derek Anderson to compete for the job. They could’ve at least traded for Kyle Orton so Leinart would have a new drinking buddy – anything to make the season interesting, because it certainly won’t be all that competitive.
5) Every single thing that the Cleveland Browns have done so far.
As usual, the Browns managed to play badly enough to suck away most of their fanbase’s will to live, yet show enough signs of life to keep them foolishly optimistic for next year. Toss in Mike Holmgren coming to town as their pigskin messiah and Cleveland fans actually thought something good was going to happen. Then he actually started doing stuff and everything went straight to hell in a handbasket. To cure the logjam of crappy quarterbacks, they dropped Derek Anderson like a bad habit and traded Brady Quinn away for a mediocre runningback and a bag of used tissues… then immediately re-stocked with Seneca Wallace and Jake Delhomme. Now, is it just me or did they trade two dimes and a nickel for a quarter or what? Dumping Quinn and Anderson was necessitated by the inaction of previous management – but going out and giving Delhomme $7 million guaranteed less than a month after he was run out of Carolina on a rail goes beyond foolish into certifiably insane.
Think you can top it? Drop a comment and prove it.
